Crafty Warcraft

World War II. Definitely a nasty war by all standards. A war requiring brilliant minds and creative ideas as one can read from this news item. Welcome to the mind of some of history's most important war strategists. Putting female hormones into Hitler's food in an attempt to make him less aggressive? Drop glue on German troops? I figure if these suggestions are considered valid and smart, I may as well throw some ideas of my own. So here are some alternative suggestions that just sprang from my wandering mind. A bit late to bring about Hitler's demise, but they might come in handy for other bad-ass world leaders during wartime:

Frankincense bombing:
Guaranteed mellowness for an entire country.
Warcraft games:
Virtual reality to replace or deflect the need for complete annihilation.
Planking attacks:
Because a stiff enemy just ain't no fun.
Hallmark cards:
Nothing speaks as much as a Hallmark card.
Glamour makeover:
Because looking good equals feeling good.
Free lottery tickets:
Winning price, a ticket to the moon. One-way, non-refundable. No correspondence possible concerning the outcome.
Broadcasting Reggae music:
'Don't worry be happy', 'simmer down', and 'judge not' to induce the feeling of love. Admittedly, the songs 'no woman, no cry' and 'stir it up' might not be suitable in this case, stringent selection is imperative.
Feathers and tar:
It has been known to work throughout history. Worst thing that can happen is that it makes the enemy more fluffy.
Pet presents:
After all, pets help to reduce stress and loneliness, as well as enhance socialization and attitudes.
Vuvuzela precision bombarding:
If it drove people insane at the 2010 World Cup matches, it just might do the trick for an army.

And should all these methods fail, we can always rely on the classical time-out. Hey, I figure if it works for my son, it might work for the Hitlers of the world too.